12-2008
TODD'S FAVORITE ADULT ACTORS AND THEIR FAVORITE FLOWERS
Maybe we should just let Todd do the talking:
Hi Potential Buyer,
I’ve long fantasized about this moment. I can see you now, reclining at your cubicle, cozy under the warm embrace of a hand-knitted wool afghan. It’s cold. Shivering, you slowly turn through Todd’s Favorite Adult Actors and Their Favorite Flowers. I’ve prepared this booklet especially for you; it’s a deeply intimate account of my romantic encounters with several favorite paramours. The electricity is out and you’re forced to read by candlelight. I tell you that I love you as I comb through your chest hair. We will be friends forever.
All my love,
Todd
Todd’s Favorite Adult Actors and Their Favorite Flowers is a zine by artist Zach Huelsing and writer Matt Kessler. This hand-assembled portfolio consists of a set of eight
cards depicting adult film stars and their favorite flowers. The cards are designed to loosely mimic baseball cards, complete with appropriate stats and a fictitious anecdote about the collector’s imaginative run-ins with the actors.
The cards are presented in protective sleeves and displayed in a Velcro-sealed portfolio. Neither book nor comic, Todd’s Favorite Adult Actors and Their Favorite Flowers relates the humorous and misinformed tale of Todd’s fantasies in a fun and unique way. And it can be yours for only $10 + $2 S&H.
By Matt Kessler and Zach Huelsing.
11-2007
THE NATIONAL SCIENCE FAIR OF AMAZING NEW DISCOVERIES
The National Science Fair Of Amazing New Discoveries is a 40 page illustrated story, showcasing the finest new inventions the science world has to offer, including dancing toilets, blogging minnows, and scripture-reciting bowling balls. These most wonderful inventions are lovingly illustrated so that readers may marvel all the more at these, the science world's most recent and most excellent advancements. The story relates the search conducted by an esteemed board of judges to find that one invention which is truly the most amazing and new. Buy your copy now! $7 + $2 S&H.
By Matt Kessler.
07-2007
WORKS CITED
Limited-edition release!
Works Cited is a collection of papers chronicling the classroom episodes of an antagonistic elementary school rad dude, an introspective girl with a bad case of Brad-lust, and a budding poet who may or may not eat her own boogers.
Monitor the progress of these students (and their classmates at Wright Preparatory Academy) in an interconnected series of exam blue books, art projects, essays, confiscated notes, study hall drawings, and teacher-authored memos.
All of this and more collected in hand-drawn manila envelope covers featuring 10 awesome (and awesomely defaced) designs. Limited to 300 numbered editions and moving fast! Order below via Paypal with account or credit card. Only $6 + $2 for shipping.
08-2006
DIAMONDS #1
Released to much acclaim and disdain in the summer of 2006, Diamonds: A Teen Girl's Guide to Baseball has been every girl's most reliable BFF ever since.
Diamonds dishes on what it's like to have a swinger in your dugout, leaks makeover secrets that'll transform your guy into a Philadelphia Phanatic stud, and tells-all about the first time Barry Zito got to first base.
This juicy goss and more in four fully illustrated pages (now in its second printing). Buy a copy for the special girl that you'd like to have in your life. As a matter of fact, at $.25 a copy, buy ten or twenty copies and see what happens. Start learning from the pros today! Only $.25 + $.50 for shipping.
